What does one tenth of one percent look like? In my world when I envision .001 I see Judi Chaitman, Vice President and Manager of Great Getaways. Judi has been selected as one of the TOP TRAVEL SPECIALISTS in the world by Conde Nast Traveler Magazine (August, 2007 edition)! This marks the SEVENTH (7th) year Judi has received this amazing honor! Wendy Perrin, Consumer Affairs Editor of Conde Nast Traveler, annually selects the best of the best in the world of travel providers. This is a tall order by any stretch of the imagination because, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, there are over 88,950 travel “agents” in the US alone!

Sorry to sound bossy—just consider me your “Travel Mom”! Like a regular mom I have your best interests at heart. I’ve suggested for years that everyone should get a passport and the zoo that we fondly call the passport application process is proof positive you need to get a passport! Having a passport is like the way we used to think about the American Express card (not anymore, thank God!) with their slogan, “Don’t leave home without it!” It’s official, it’s uniform, and it is accepted all over this planet as proof of citizenship.

So, what are you waiting for? Download an application at www.travel.state.gov

Need a certified copy of your birth certificate for the passport application? While you’re ordering one, I suggest you order two and keep the extra one in a safe place. I promise the day will come that you will once again be asked for a birth certificate for some yet to be invented government form, and, voila, you’ll already have one!

Also, be sure to check the entry requirements of the country(ies) you’ll be visiting. Many require that your passport be valid for 6 months past the date of your visit. Others require multiple blank, facing Visa pages (which you might not have because you’ve used them on previous journeys we created for you!).

Create 2 photocopies of your passport and take one copy with you (not in the same place you store your real passport) and leave one copy with us (or should you, for some reason not understood in the world of logic, use another travel company, give them a copy–hopefully, they’ll know to keep it safe for you!). If that moment we all fear, the loss of our passport, does occur, then having copies will expedite the replacement process.

There, now don’t you feel better? See how your mama loves you! Now, brush your teeth and go to bed. That’s what I’m going to do!

  Please, please, please click on the image to preview the ultra cool Save the Date card we’re sending for Great Getaways 15th Anniversary Bash!

Now, for those of you who aren’t susceptible to my pleading here’s the info in readable text:

SAVE THE DATE FOR OUR OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD 15TH ANNIVERSARY BASH!  SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 16TH AT ARTichokes IN MISSION FARMS

 If you tell me you can read the image to the left without enlarging it, I want the name of your opthamologist! It reads:

The Leawood travel agency that gives you the luxury of experience is turning 15! Treat yourself to a night of experience at ARTichokes, Leawood’s premier art space in Mission Farms, Sunday, September 16, 2007, 7 – 10 PM, ARTichokes, 10557 Mission Road, Leawood; Light Hors d’ Oeuvres; Cruise & Vacation Silent Auction to Benefit Alzheimers Association; Sponsored by: Great Getaways, Virgin Galactic, Holland America Line, Creative Leisure, ARTichokes, Oberoi Hotels & Resorts, SPACES magazine

No need to read on because I know you’re anxious to put the date in your calendar, pda, or perhaps create a tasteful tattoo reminder!

 

 

Consider doing away with certain holidays–say, perhaps Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Administrative Assistant’s Day? I know that change would sorely disappoint Hallmark, American Greetings, your local florist, and stores that sell men’s ties and/or golfballs; but think about it. What would our world look like?

For me, doing away with a particular day would remind me to rise to the occasion of treating my mom, my husband, any assistant I may have someday, with courtesy, kindness and respect on a daily basis. I would learn to connect with these people in a genuine, caring manner. I’d look into their eyes and say, “I love you,” “You are very special to me,” and “I respect you.” I’d demonstrate by my actions that the words I utter are real and verifiable.

Instead of finding the one “wow” bouquet to send my mom, I could send her a small violet plant (she loves African violets) from time to time or some English toffee (another of her favorite things). I could tell Michael that next few days look like excellent golfing weather and that I hope he plays a few rounds; I could take the assistant (tbd at the present time) to lunch just because.

Hmmm, maybe that’s not a bad idea—trading a day of artificial sweetness for a lifetime of grateful action. I just may be on to something!

 “Mrs. King, is it true you now frequently watch the Science Channel?”

“Yes,” I answer gazing into the eyes of the Arbiter of Suburban Women’s Guide to Appropriate Behavior.

“And you read msnbc.com’s Space News and Alan Boyle’s Cosmic Log on a regular basis?” she shook her head in disgust.

“I do! They are really interesting! You ought to check out the slide show, ‘Explore the wonders of Space’ on the msnbc.com Space site!” 

“Mrs. King, my question only needed a simple yes or no answer! Please control your enthusiasm!”

“Control my enthusiasm? Hello! Are you alive? Where have you been hiding? I used to be like you a long time ago (pre 12/5/06 when I was selected to become an Accredited Space Agent for Virgin Galactic!). Oh, I knew about Space: I had to recite the planets in order at school (so what is the final verdict on Pluto, by the way?); I watched the first moonwalk; I watched the Tom Hank’s narrated film about the cosmos at the Rose Space Center at the American Museum of Natural History; I’ve wished upon stars (several times and still do—star light, star bright, first star I see tonight!). Yes, I knew about Space.”

“And now,” I continued (I was on a roll now!),”we have an opportunity to experience Space! Thank you, Peter Diamondis (Zero G founder and X Prize creator), Burt Rutan, and Sir Richard Branson!”

I turned to face the Arbitor, “Life changed for me when I realized I could be part of a group of people that would help others experience Space! After only 2 short days at the Kennedy Space Center (training to be an ASA), I was hooked! My life has been forever altered (Is this what Stephen Covey means when he talks about paradigm shift?) and my horizons broadened.

I reached down and pulled up Exhibit A, an illustration comparing the size of Earth to other planets, stars, universes. “Do you see this little blip over here?” I asked shining my laser pointer to a small almost invisible speck. “That is Earth! And on that speck sits billions of humans, many struggling to survive.

There are some humans, believe it or not, who are consumed with whether Prada or Be & D are the handbag of the moment, whether to buy a Mia Bossi diaper bag or trade in their old, worn diamond solitaire for a splashier Michael Beaudry bling.

So whether malnourished and starving or suffocating on self-indulgence, don’t you think we’d all benefit from learning more about the vast universe which houses our speck of a planet? Who knows, it may help us create life saving opportunities for those ridden with diseases that are currently incurable and even give the self-consumed new trinkets to add to their stash! So from the ridiculous to the sublime, the visceral to the fanciful, we must turn our attention to Space! Today I know there is so much more to learn and more to experience. So, if you are asking me to rein in my enthusiasm for Space and return to the exploits of ‘Desperate Housewives’,  ’Grey’s Anatomy’ and ‘How ’bout them Chiefs?’, I don’t think so! And besides, even the designers are getting in on the action! Aren’t you wearing one of Versace’s new space-goddess gowns?” 

After she  consulted with her committee, the Arbiter picked up her Coach bag, gathered her belongings, and walked towards the exit. “You’re hopeless!” she declared. “It’s Balenciaga! Guilty as charged!”

 

I’m devastated! I’m crushed! I’m so disillusioned! Before I explain why, let me give you some background:

Today is April 13th, Friday, April 13th to be exact and it started out being a “Lucky” day! Michael and I winged our way from Kansas City to Rochester, New York to attend Krista and David’s renewal of their vows (aka an official wedding post Iraq!). I blogged about Krista and David on March 25th (once again, I present the Cliff’s Notes version of a past blog: Krista is our niece; she met David in the Reserves; they got engaged; Krista’s unit was called up to Iraq; they were married by a priest prior to deployment; Krista is back, toting Purple Heart and Bronze Star; now we’re having the “official” wedding; Krista is being redeployed to Iraq…). It is very cold in Rochester—still not an unlucky thing—we left brrrrr cold KC. We attended the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner, and we planned to go to…………….drum roll, please…………WEGMANS!!!

You remember Wegmans, don’t you? (See Feb. 23 blog) I salivate just saying the word, Wegmans—-Wegmans, Wegmans, Wegmans—oooohhh! Six of us plan this exciting outing–Michael, me, Sandy and Chuck (Michael’s sister and brother-in-law), and John and Diane (cousins). Six normal looking adults, of apparent sound mind and body, headed out to Wegmans. You may know Rochester for Eastman Kodak, Rochester Institute of Technology, or proximity to Corning. I think Rochester’s biggest claim to fame is being the birthplace of Wegmans! Based on a recommendation from a local Rochesterian, we eagerly drove (thank you John for having a GPS) to the food mecca. We raced inside and there it was…

…a not particularly clean, boringly stocked (i.e. no pretty displays), large supermarket. Greeting us at the front door was the produce section with a display of broccoli remnants and a few tomatoes. Nobody was stocking the display. It just sat there–forlorn, neglected, alone. “Oh no!” cried the grocery goddess and food know-it-all that lives in my head, “Tell me this isn’t so!” “Not to worry!” the hopeful child inside admonished, “Let’s look at the yummy pasteries in the bakery!” Off we went to explore the bakery section. Adults, please, if you have a child reading this, you may want them to look away because the next words may be offensive and graphic—-the doughnut trays were half *#h)ptH  *#)$& empty!!! Okay, there I’ve said it. I’m not proud of my reaction and yet I have to be honest! Even the flower section was paltry by Wegmans standards.

The average person, not already used to the high quality of food and displays at the Wegmans in Hunt Valley, MD, may have been impressed (except for the barren broccoli display). After all, we were still in a very large, well stocked supermarket, but it just wasn’t that over the top, oh my God I want to shop there, aesthetically spectacular experience I remember. It was just another supermarket and who wants to roam around a grocery store after dinner on a Friday night? Wegmans, what happened to you? Are you experiencing PMS (plain, mediocre supermarket)? Is this a temporary situation or is Thomas Wolfe correct, “You can’t go home again?”

Dust bunnies—what’s the origin of that phrase? I know what they are  and this morning I “swiffered” many of them to a new home in the trash can—but why dust “bunnies”–bunnies are cute, as in Easter and flop-eared, but dust bunnies—help me out, here! Ah, I just used another pop cliche, didn’t I?

 Today’s New York Times Travel Magazine had an article dubbed “The Talk”, featuring three words: grass-roots, ur-, and tradical. I like “grass-roots”–it fits with the whole “local is better, more energy efficient, free from the craziness that dominates the world” movement. I like grass-roots—Queen King allows it to stay in her vernacular.

Next is “ur-”—some confusion there, I think. NYT claims it is a prefix that means original or prototypical…Points up the obsesssion in travel with finding the ultimate…” Ultimate, that I understand, for example “uber–”, kind of “super” on steroids. So the ur-baguette referred to in the article about France suggests (to moi) “uber” or epitome.

 Tradical will not be discussed because I don’t like the word, too trendy, and, besides, this is my blog. I can write what I want (she offers maturely!). So, there you have it, Barbara’s thoughts on words today. Your turn, Stephen Colbert!

 

My friend Charlie noticed I hadn’t blogged for awhile and I told him that I was too busy doing “stuff” (working, catching up at work after being in NYC, planning for the visit of Carolyn Wincer, Head of Astronaut Sales for Virgin Galactic, on Monday 3/27, oh, and did I mention working?). I assured Charlie that I was eager to get back to the blog, that I had lots of great ideas of what I wanted to write about.

I came home from work (that word keeps coming up, doesn’t it?), sat down at the computer, and FROZE! Okay, Barbara, where did all those good ideas go? Remember, the insight on life you had a couple of nights ago? How about those clever comments you had while taking the subway to the bball games in NYC? That incisive polital and social commentary?

Does that ever happen to you? I seem to have great thoughts during the night and wake up with only a vague, if any, recollection of what rolled through my brain while my body tried to sleep. Other times, while you and I are having a conversation, you’ll say something that triggers some amazing observation to race through my brain. When I open my mouth to share the pearls of wisdom, nothing comes out! That racing thought is probaly somewhere in outer space, eager to leave my cluttered brain.

In the past several months I’ve had the realization that the world is changing much faster than I am. I walked through some clothing stores recently and couldn’t figure out why the racks were full of “young people’s stuff” aka things I wouldn’t (and couldn’t) wear. Who, I wondered, buys these things? Where did all the good stuff, the familiar stuff, go? When did stores change how they merchandise?

I love Antrhopologie—it’s colorful, edgy, funky, and a wonderful mish-mosh of things that seemingly don’t belong together and yet complement each other perfectly. Ceramic knobs are scattered across teeny, tiny little sweaters and both are for sale! Pricy t-shirts are piled next to scads of notecards, both on a painted tin tray—again, all begging to come home with me. What is dawning in my over-stuffed and cobwebbed brain, is that type of merchandising is more the norm than the exception! Locally, there’s Feng, Style & Grace, Standard Style—to name a few “mixed bag” or “buy the dress and the armoire it’s displayed in” stores. They’re fun and I love their creative energy but they challenge me to “independently” create an outfit, to pretend I’m secure enough to know what my “style” is!

 I’m getting old, I guess. I’ll be 59 soon and I don’t think of that as old (although I’ve come to accept that my true definition of old is anything that is 30 years older than I am).  I am acutely aware that while we boomers may be an important influence on culture, we are no longer setting the trends…and maybe that’s okay! Maybe, I’m more interested today in the quality of my life and less on the quantity. The world may moving in a very different direction and today I’m comfortable ambling along my own path.

So, I guess that’s my inspiring input for today. The topic is either “I like who I am and I am content on my journey” or “She’s older than dirt–let’s humor her.” Do me a favor, don’t tell me which subject you picked!