Just saw what Jessica Simpson and Mariah Carey wear when boarding an aircraft to jet off to an appointment, a concert, a whatever—just to jet off! Clothing is chic and of the latest, trendiest designers—but the shoes—-help me out, here! Designer platform high, spiked heels? I hope they carry an extra pair—-a few sizes larger!

 

I have traveled in cattle class, medium, and well-done (oops—still thinking about "cattle class!"). I have found that my feet don't care where I sit on the plane or how much I paid for my seat. In fact, my feet have a certain singleness of purpose—to plump up, inflate, to swell. It's really not a pretty sight and, perhaps, if you just finished a meal, you might want to pause before reading on. My feet resemble lumps of Play-Doh taken straight from the can with ten plump, round Play-Doh balls attached to the ends.

 

Sure, I bet you've heard the trick of not taking off your shoes while in flight…doesn't work—well, it does, sort of…if having skin overflow your shoes is what floats your boat—aah, float rhymes with bloat! So, ix-nay on the spiky platform heels and es-yay to Travel Sox (what I wear—no ownership or referral fees, I swear!) or any compression-type sock brand. They are very comfortable, look like regular socks, and, most important, when I get off the plane at my final destination, I can then wear the platform, spiky heels! Of course, there's only one small problem—-I don't think I could balance on those wobbly designer must-haves. Do you think they were really designed by an out-of-work orthopedic surgeon?